There’s this awful trap that I keep getting caught in. A trap that sometimes locks me in this dark, lonely cave that is hard to navigate my way out of. It’s kind of like looking at Medusa – except you don’t die – but if you look at her deceitful eyes, and allow all of those “less than” stones to close in on you, it traps you…and, it’s horrible…and, NO ONE should ever have to experience this.
This trap I’m talking about is the “comparison trap”…You know, where you see everyone’s lives laid out in what appears to be this sweet, easy perfection and you wonder what you’re doing wrong. Or, you find yourself watching t.v. or maybe reading a magazine and actually believing that what you see is the standard for which you should be aspiring…but, it feels impossible….and, you feel like you’ll never be good enough. All of this means that you must be failing, right?!
The practice of constantly comparing ourselves to others has to stop! It is taking with it our joy and enthusiasm for life!
Whether you are short or tall, skinny or maybe have a little “more to love” on you; whatever color your skin may be, or where you are from; financially rich, poor or somewhere in between; whatever interests you, whatever you excel or do not excel at; married or not, kids or no kids, stay-at-home parent or full-time-outside-the-home working parent….the list goes on! The question here is: What makes any of those things better than the other?
We are allowing other people to set the standard for what life should look like and how we should look while living it.
Who says 5’0” isn’t perfect? Or, that 6’5” isn’t also perfect? Who says that being able to DIY everything is a must to living a fulfilled life? Or, who says you can’t DIY everything and be good at it?
I found this great quote by Arianna Huffington that says, “The fastest way to break the cycle of perfectionism and become a fearless mother is to give up the idea of doing it perfectly – indeed to embrace the uncertainty and imperfection.”*
I love this quote. Life is so much better when we just allow it to be what it is instead of what others say it should be.
I have four amazing and very unique kids under the age of twelve. Sometimes I just look at them and wish I could see myself the way they see themselves. They come out of the womb and they just are who they are. They don’t come out comparing themselves to anyone else. Who they are is perfect AS IS. I don’t want this to change. I hate knowing that it probably will.
So, I’m going to start with me! I am going to love me in all of my imperfections. I am going to stop comparing myself to others. Whenever I start questioning myself, I’m going to ask, “Says Who?” Let’s take this journey of self-empowerment together and start the #SAYSWHO campaign.
Have you ever noticed that by simply adding and apostrophe and a space to the word “imperfection” you spell “I’m perfection”?
That sounds good to me.
(And to this guy…)
*Arianna Huffington. (n.d.). BrainyQuote.com. Retrieved July 7, 2017, from BrainyQuote.com Web site: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/a/ariannahuf395723.html
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